Dear Victoria’s Secret,
My immediate reaction to hearing your swim line was being discontinued to promote sales on push-up bras and lace slips: Who even buys your lingerie? You sell lingerie? I thought you were meant to sell me bright halters and cheeky swim bottoms that bared a little too much ass cheek. It’s okay Victoria (can I call you Vick?) because my heart may be broken, but it’s not dead. I can be understanding. And compassionate. I’ll still purchase your Pink sweats and fall for the 5 for 25 underwear scam. But I’m still going to miss…
…going to the beach and seeing every girl wear the VS summer swim trend. Never having to ask anyone where they got their adorable bathing suits from is a luxury I’ve taken advantage of over the years, and I’m sorry for that.
…owning the same bathing suits as my friends. Always. The picture twinning opportunities were endless.
…being able to basically buy a bra made of waterproof material. What am I supposed to do now? Buy a bathing suit top in size small, medium or large? Haha kill me.
…gawking at models in the annual VS Swim catalog and then scrutinizing every. single. one to look for Photoshop fails. No one can be that skinny and still have big boobs. No one.
…curing my end of summer blues and anticipating the next summer by filling up my online cart with bathing suits that were kind of ugly no one really liked went on clearance for $14.99.
…my local VS always awaiting me with open arms when I needed a last minute swimsuit for a pool party I probably didn’t want to attend in the first place.
Sincerely,
A very basic girl who will forever miss your bright bandeaus
le fook 